Monthly Archives: July 2010

#995 Having to pee an hour before wakeup time

The aching in your bladder has nudged you awake.  As your eyes focus from your sleepy stupor, you stare at the red glow of your alarm clock .  It reads 5:00.  Your brain starts to process.  Slowly.  Weekday? Yes, weekday.  … Continue reading

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#996 Texts with poor grammar

It’s all figured out.  The only question remaining is what song to play as you are walking down the aisle.  Things couldn’t be more perfect- witty conversation, breathtaking beauty, similar interests.  You even rent The Notebook just to saturate yourself … Continue reading

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#997 Showers with low water pressure

You are ready to sand-blast the germs right off of your skin.  Heck, you’re even ready to give up a dermal layer or two in the process.  You turn on the bottom faucet at your temporary showering establishment.  The sweet … Continue reading

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#998 Bonking your head

It’s early.  You are squatting in the kitchen looking for the box of Captain Crunch.  Or maybe it’s a frying pan that SOMEbody decided to place not only under, but also behind every other kitchen utensil that you own.  You … Continue reading

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#999 Leaving your cell phone charger behind

You had an amazing weekend with friends, but now it is time to bid adieu.  Your bag is packed, you start the process of thanking, rethanking and assuring your host that you had a wonderful time.  One last peek in … Continue reading

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#1000 Mushy Apples

Perhaps in the reddist Braeburn you’ve ever seen, the greenest Granny Smith you could ever imagine.  You can suddenly see why Eve picked this fruit off of that forbidden tree.  It has been patiently waiting for your consumption all day- … Continue reading

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#1001 Wet socks

You have been running around the house like decapitated poultry.  Belt on, shirt buttoned, you are finally ready to go.  Maybe you are a tad late, but if everything goes as planned you will just make it.  All your belongings … Continue reading

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